What Is Real?
Is it only what we can smell, taste, hear, see, or feel?
Are things only real if they can be examined through logic and mathematics, or do experiences also count as part of reality? And what about our consciousness and our experience of self? Is there a separate “me” that senses, feels, thinks, and observes? Or could that, too, be just another feeling — something created by the brain as it interprets incoming sensory input?
We can debate the nature of reality, but one thing that cannot be denied is the reality of subjective experience.
An experience might be inaccurate, but to the one who experiences it, it still feels true. Think of phantom pain, or a mirage. Someone might feel burning pain in a limb that no longer exists, or see a distant oasis that vanishes upon arrival. These experiences are rooted in error, but they are real to the person having them.
If something can feel real and still be a misinterpretation of reality, what does that say about our emotions?
Emotions are the body’s response to thoughts. They strongly influence our actions and decisions. They are deeply meaningful — but does that mean they are always true? And what about the thoughts behind those emotions? Thoughts are often formed through our interpretation of stimuli, either external or internal. It’s entirely possible to make flawed interpretations, which then create faulty thought patterns. These in turn lead to emotions that may not be incorrect in themselves, but which can trigger reactions that aren't in our best interest.
Many of our responses are automatic and learned over time. We rarely stop to question our own thoughts, feelings, or behaviors. Few people even reflect on how they act. But if you notice recurring patterns in your life, or feel unsatisfied with your current situation, it may be worth examining your behavior, emotions, and thinking more closely — especially if your actions are causing harm to yourself or those around you.
A good place to begin is by identifying the specific behavior you want to change, especially if it is clearly causing harm.
From there, you can take a step back and ask:
What emotion is triggering this behavior?
Keep in mind that it might be a primary emotion or a secondary one, so learning to identify your emotional states is important.
Once you understand the emotion behind the behavior, the next step is to ask:
What thought is creating this feeling?
And then go one step further:
What interpretation or trigger gave rise to that thought in the first place?
This last step matters because if the original interpretation was incorrect, the entire chain reaction is misaligned.
And if that’s the case, the suffering that follows — whether yours or someone else’s — was unnecessary.
Each of us views life from our own perspective. Through this subjective lens, we interpret the world and create what we believe is reality. If we want to change that reality, we must first turn inward. We need to examine our thoughts, experiences, and behaviors. And if we are willing to do the work, we might discover an entirely different version of reality — one that offers more possibilities and a better life.
